Monday, February 07, 2005
Rustbucket run-to-the-dump day
..if the old beastie will crank. It better, the bed is kinda full.
Sometimes it's difficult to understand why everybody has to spend 1/7th of their lives on Monday.
More than likely you've seen the Bush Budget Calls for Cuts in Health Services headline. Nu Yawk Times of course. One part of this 'editorial' states:
OK. Let's think about this. From page 7 of the pdf, "Overview of the National Institutes of Health", we get this little bar chart:
Kinda looks like exponential growth, doesn't it? Wonder what we get for all those billions and billions? (sorry Carl! ;o)
$28.7 billion. That is slightly over half of the entire bloated budget of Florida with a population of over 17,000,000.
I'd imagine not just a whole hell of a lot that such a vast amount of stolen money should, simply because it is going into the ultimate malignancy known as government bureaucracy. More little empires expanded, more fancy new facilities, lots of new toys, raises, bonuses, and better benefits all around. All stuffed into "special" congresscritters' districts so the congresscritters get re-elected 'cause they brought all that new "federal money" into their local economies. Doesn't make a one bean fart's difference what is "produced" as long as it has lots of "documents". Did the EPA commision the NIH to "research" the possible use for the anal secretions of the Endangered Giant Flying Vampire Toad? (thanks, Uncle Al) Jacking up a gubment bureaucracy's danegeld so fast strikes me about as useful as casting pearls before swine.
* * * * * *
KRAK - Radio Interview
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. This is your host, Nan Blather interviewing, er what's your name?
Didn't say
Er, Here it is! Bogdaddy.. Tell me Mr. Bog, why are you running for the newly created Office for the Protection of the Endangered Giant Flying Vampire Toad?
BD: Bogdaddy. Bog is swamp now known as Endangered Wetlands.
NB: Sorry Mr. Bogdaddy, why are you running for this office?
BD: Bogdaddy. 'Mr.' has Serious Sexual non-PC connotations.
NB: Bogdaddy, some folk say you don't have the qualifications required to administer the Office for the Protection of the Endangered Flying Vampire Toad. Why do you think you're the best man?
BD: Best man sexist. Weenies in Endangered Wetlands have saturated market for sleep-and-pay uselessness jobs. OPEGFVT sounds good.
NB: We have to take a break now for one of our wonderful new sponsors, the folk that have been bringing you the new and improved "Armpitto", the marveous chemically free, totally biodegradeable, invisible substance that will allow even those of unspecified gender to smell French even if you have recently bathed in our endangered water! It even comes in totally biodegradeable containers made of recycled chads!
(music fades up to unbearable level. 14 people die in the attempt to turn volume down before eardrums rupture. Trial lawyer stock rises 20 points. Zenith stock drops.)
NB: Mr. Bogdaddy, you are not being very forthcoming.
NB: You are not responding. Why are you so quiet?
BD: Answers need questions.
NB: OK. When we come back from break, will you be more willing to talk?
BD: No
NB: Why? Do I bother you?
BD: Two questions. Good! First answer, ask question, get answer. Second, you could use a bath.
(jingle playing in the background for the "New and Improved thong underwear provided to You, the Consumer in our vast Collective by the Unionized Children’s Kathy Lee Design Team" music fades....)
NB: We are back now with Bogdaddy, candidate for office in the tightly contested race for who will be Commissar in the Office for the Protection of the Endangered Giant Flying Vampire Toad. I see here in your bio that you are a registered Democrat but you've never voted for one in the last 33 years. Tell our audience why that's so.
BD: There are no Republicans in Crosspatch County.
NB: Oh come on now Mr. ...er, Bogdaddy, surely you are wrong. I see here from the county records there are 112 registered.
BD: There are also 476 black panthers in the county. Must be true. The Crosspatch Dispatch printed that 3 people were eaten in Farkleberg last week.
NB: Ah! I see we are opening you up! Do you usually respond to questions so abruptly or are you just a bit microphone shy?
BD: No.
NB: (struggling to retain control) I asked you 2 questions and you just said no. Explain yourself.
BD: 2 questions, one answer. Less is usually better.
NB: Hah! I caught you out! You used a qualifier! Tell us what you mean by using the word 'usually'!
BD: Are you married?
NB: Yes as a matter of fact. My significant other and I wed in Barneyfrankopolis in Azlan at the DMZ just last month. Please answer my question!
BD: Leggy blonde with the cute butt over there? (pointing)
NB: Yes dammit. That's Jonnye and I'll have you know that...
BD: Dinner tonight? Just had bed retreaded. Goodyear, not Firestone. More can be better.
BD: Got a batch of fresh crabs, new pot, lots of gas...
* * * * * *
New neighbors
Sometimes it's difficult to understand why everybody has to spend 1/7th of their lives on Monday.
More than likely you've seen the Bush Budget Calls for Cuts in Health Services headline. Nu Yawk Times of course. One part of this 'editorial' states:
"Under the president's request, the budget of the National Institutes of Health, which doubled from 1998 to 2003, would rise by 0.7 percent, to $28.7 billion next year. That is much less than what would be needed to keep pace with the costs of biomedical research, which are rising more than 3.5 percent a year."
OK. Let's think about this. From page 7 of the pdf, "Overview of the National Institutes of Health", we get this little bar chart:
Kinda looks like exponential growth, doesn't it? Wonder what we get for all those billions and billions? (sorry Carl! ;o)
$28.7 billion. That is slightly over half of the entire bloated budget of Florida with a population of over 17,000,000.
I'd imagine not just a whole hell of a lot that such a vast amount of stolen money should, simply because it is going into the ultimate malignancy known as government bureaucracy. More little empires expanded, more fancy new facilities, lots of new toys, raises, bonuses, and better benefits all around. All stuffed into "special" congresscritters' districts so the congresscritters get re-elected 'cause they brought all that new "federal money" into their local economies. Doesn't make a one bean fart's difference what is "produced" as long as it has lots of "documents". Did the EPA commision the NIH to "research" the possible use for the anal secretions of the Endangered Giant Flying Vampire Toad? (thanks, Uncle Al) Jacking up a gubment bureaucracy's danegeld so fast strikes me about as useful as casting pearls before swine.
* * * * * *
KRAK - Radio Interview
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. This is your host, Nan Blather interviewing, er what's your name?
Didn't say
Er, Here it is! Bogdaddy.. Tell me Mr. Bog, why are you running for the newly created Office for the Protection of the Endangered Giant Flying Vampire Toad?
BD: Bogdaddy. Bog is swamp now known as Endangered Wetlands.
NB: Sorry Mr. Bogdaddy, why are you running for this office?
BD: Bogdaddy. 'Mr.' has Serious Sexual non-PC connotations.
NB: Bogdaddy, some folk say you don't have the qualifications required to administer the Office for the Protection of the Endangered Flying Vampire Toad. Why do you think you're the best man?
BD: Best man sexist. Weenies in Endangered Wetlands have saturated market for sleep-and-pay uselessness jobs. OPEGFVT sounds good.
NB: We have to take a break now for one of our wonderful new sponsors, the folk that have been bringing you the new and improved "Armpitto", the marveous chemically free, totally biodegradeable, invisible substance that will allow even those of unspecified gender to smell French even if you have recently bathed in our endangered water! It even comes in totally biodegradeable containers made of recycled chads!
(music fades up to unbearable level. 14 people die in the attempt to turn volume down before eardrums rupture. Trial lawyer stock rises 20 points. Zenith stock drops.)
NB: Mr. Bogdaddy, you are not being very forthcoming.
NB: You are not responding. Why are you so quiet?
BD: Answers need questions.
NB: OK. When we come back from break, will you be more willing to talk?
BD: No
NB: Why? Do I bother you?
BD: Two questions. Good! First answer, ask question, get answer. Second, you could use a bath.
(jingle playing in the background for the "New and Improved thong underwear provided to You, the Consumer in our vast Collective by the Unionized Children’s Kathy Lee Design Team" music fades....)
NB: We are back now with Bogdaddy, candidate for office in the tightly contested race for who will be Commissar in the Office for the Protection of the Endangered Giant Flying Vampire Toad. I see here in your bio that you are a registered Democrat but you've never voted for one in the last 33 years. Tell our audience why that's so.
BD: There are no Republicans in Crosspatch County.
NB: Oh come on now Mr. ...er, Bogdaddy, surely you are wrong. I see here from the county records there are 112 registered.
BD: There are also 476 black panthers in the county. Must be true. The Crosspatch Dispatch printed that 3 people were eaten in Farkleberg last week.
NB: Ah! I see we are opening you up! Do you usually respond to questions so abruptly or are you just a bit microphone shy?
BD: No.
NB: (struggling to retain control) I asked you 2 questions and you just said no. Explain yourself.
BD: 2 questions, one answer. Less is usually better.
NB: Hah! I caught you out! You used a qualifier! Tell us what you mean by using the word 'usually'!
BD: Are you married?
NB: Yes as a matter of fact. My significant other and I wed in Barneyfrankopolis in Azlan at the DMZ just last month. Please answer my question!
BD: Leggy blonde with the cute butt over there? (pointing)
NB: Yes dammit. That's Jonnye and I'll have you know that...
BD: Dinner tonight? Just had bed retreaded. Goodyear, not Firestone. More can be better.
BD: Got a batch of fresh crabs, new pot, lots of gas...
* * * * * *
New neighbors
